Do better Blogger

So I almost never use my computer at home. I use a computer so much at work, that when I get home I just don't want to. So, I use my phone for most everything.  (All that is back story)

The blogger app doesn't work correctly. It won't publish with pictures. And as we all know pictures rock. I've been at turns cross, sad, and frustrated with the situation. Apparently blogger doesn't care because it's been going on for years. I primarily use this blog as a history of creations. I suppose I'm going to have to move to a platform that works. <imagine sad face here>

Message from the universe...

Had an incident at work the other day and did a little therapeutic writing about it. I looked up a good graphic to go with it, but the darn thing wouldn't post. Received an error message, more than once. Ended up trying another post but the same error message. At which point I said okay I don't wanna post it anyway--just a tad snarky.  Now however, with the advantage of time and space I can see how I was being helped into not posting a mini rant that I'd never want to read again anyway.

Gotta love happy accidents

Gratitude

So, I've had some clear messages recently and thought to take a moment to express my gratitude. I'm a quest kind of person... okay, it's late and I'm not sure that's exactly the right word... seeker is maybe more accurate. I'm a seeker. I love learning new things, trying new things, etc.  Also, I crave meaning.  So, I usually have a lot of questions swirling around. That's just normal for me.

Sometimes I get too caught up in a question and it's too consuming and not all that productive. Sometimes a question will be overwhelming or scary and I'll put it in a 'box' and ignore the heck out of it - not all that productive. Most of the time though, I let those questions just whirr (how do you spell that word?) in the background and eventually they are resolved.

Lately, I've been trying not to put things on boxes. As Brene Brown says, I'm trying to lean into the discomfort, lean into vulnerability. So, in wrestling with a question that makes me sweaty and nervous, when I really just want to run, I've been leaning in and trying to find resolution. And by golly, it's arrived. And it really wasn't as scary as it was at first glance. Ha!

Generally, I hate it when people write cryptic crap and then don't explain it. But, some things are just personal. Period. But I also fully understand the power of the written word.  I feel so strongly about this moment that I'm putting gratitude above whatever else is going on.  It's okay. It really is.

Thank you loving universe. Thank you. Thank you for the sweet and loving people who show up at just the right moment to teach me or show me or model something that I really need. Life is a magical and wondrous happening. 

Off topic but not totally... I'd also just like to express my extreme gratitude for being the age I am. I love my 50's.

How are all of you?

Well hello world!

It has been since November that I posted here.  That seems unbelievable to me on one level, yet I

♥ Maya

know it's true.

Lots has changed, and lots has stayed the same.  There really isn't any way to document everything, so I'm just going to act like we're good friends and can pick up anywhere without a lot of explanation. Sound good?

My new job is A-OK! I love it.  I've learned so much, yet have more to learn and am really excited about that.  It was my first tax season as an accountant and ohmygoodness!  I had no idea.  We were working 60 hour weeks and there were days when I would come home and just go straight to bed. Not only were the hours more intense, there was so much to learn that my brain was exhausted.  But even as I'm writing this, I'm smiling.  It was challenging and exhausting, but it was awesome!

I've let my side business slide while adjusting to my new career.  I finally think I've sort of caught up from all that I missed January through May. Sort of being the operative phrase.

Let me ask you this...  If you miss someone's birthday, and you want to send a belated card/gift - how late is too late?

Of course I'm asking because I missed some birthdays in the beginning of the year. Really, birthdays are not my strong suit. I don't know why, and I know I need to change the way I'm telling my story, And the whole story is that my husband isn't helpful in this arena, at all. Which wouldn't bother me except I feel inadequate here and would dearly love him to step up so I'm not going it alone.

We are about to become semi-empty nesters.  Our youngest is in college and will be returning to campus very soon.  Our next to youngest is moving to his own digs even as we speak. So, we're about to be on our own.  Which is both exciting and bittersweet.  I actually really like my husband.  Yes, he drives me batty, on a fairly regular basis, but I'm crazy about him and I enjoy spending time with him. It's the easiest and best relationship I have. On the other hand, dang I love those kids and miss them like mad when they're away.

Okay, that's all for today.  It's good to be back writing.  I like writing and I've missed this little not often seen blog.

Happy Thursday World!  Watch this Mike Rowe video for a little peak into his philosophy and take on life that has had me going hmmm for days.

Thankful

Thanksgiving is a big deal here in the U.S. Once, while speaking to a Canadian business contact about another phone call that was needed, he said "This week is out because your country is getting ready to shut down for Turkey and Football." I laughed out loud. I'm still smiling about it. He wasn't being derogatory in the least. If anything he was incredulous and maybe even a little envious. I never really thought about how others, who don't celebrate the day, would perceive it and his off the cuff remark was utterly perfect.

Anyway, Thanksgiving is a big deal here and in honor of the day the hubby and I have been feeling creative. This is going into The Galena Vault this week.

Happy Fall!

It's really and truly fall here. The weather is crisp, the leaves are colorful, and I'm so happy about it. I love fall. It's always been my favorite season. Not sure why exactly, but I figure that it is back to school time is part of it. I always loved school, well except for one or two high school years when I simply tolerated most of it. I loved it with my kids and I love it now.

As seen on the Web: OMG!

Funny Story: Last year at this time I felt compelled to buy colored pencils and markers. No idea why, but you know they are like 50 cents, so I threw one of each in my cart at the grocery with a shrug. Later, I was unloading and putting things away and my niece knocks on the door. "Do you have any colored pencils or crayola markers?" she asked after a quick hug. Turns out she needed them for a homework assignment and because I had some, she and her mom didn't have to make the 20 minute (one way) trip to buy some. It was a funny and happy moment for all of us. Life is completely magical like that. I could have easily talked myself out of buying them when the urge pulled me to the supplies.

When we listen to our intuition, life is completely magical. This story reminds me to listen more and doubt less.

Yoga Update...

I know, a second update this week. Whew! How will you ever find time to do anything else if I keep posting at this pace... hee hee. Sometimes I crack myself up.

Anyway, since it's been quite some time since the last yoga update, I thought I'd share: Yes, we are still going. Twice a week very regularly. To be quite frank, while I don't love every minute of every class, I LOVE YOGA. I really do. I feel better, move better, have more flexibility, more strength and as my husband tells me quite often, I look better, too.

There are challenging poses and combinations of poses, that I struggle with and sometimes in the midst of a challenging series, I'm a tad ticked that I can't do it or do it well. But that passes quickly. Last week our instructor, Mary (♥ her) took time to tell me how pleased she was with my progress and that my plank was picture perfect. Given that when we started 3 months ago I could not do a plank is serious praise indeed. It's things like that (and there are a million of them) which make the progress so much fun. For example, when we first started I found sitting cross legged for a length of time uncomfortable. Now I don't even think about doing it. Initially downward facing dog was an effort, but now it's a position of rest. I could go on and on, but you get the idea.

It's awesome and I feel the improvement and am very happy about it. We are considering adding a third class. We'll see what November brings.

Hello Blog!

Yes, it's been some time. I'm amazed anyone has read the blog while I've been out of sight, but you have. Thanks for that. So what has been keeping me away?

Well, remember a post or two ago, when I mentioned I was considering a new job. Well, I've found a new job that I'm very excited about. Right now, I am working at both jobs, training someone to takeover at the old and training to learn my new responsibilities. It's crazy busy and I am exhausted. It's the sheer volume of stuff I don't know at the new job and trying to retain it is serious work. On Friday, I went to bed at 8:30 and I took a nap yesterday. But, I'm really excited about the new job. It's fun and interesting and challenging. It's a great office and I enjoy my new co-workers and it's work I feel good about doing.

Part of the reason I've been quiet is I've been working through all the complex emotions I have about the old job. I worked for a small non-profit and I loved the idea of working for a non profit, like the work was making a difference in the world. Like it was creating a greater good simply because it was for a non-profit. I really bought into the whole notion that I was doing God's work (which all non-profits reinforce with great intensity) and because it was God's work it was okay that I felt used or underpaid or overworked or stressed beyond reasonable expectations.

I feel like I'm justifying my decisions, but the fact of the matter is that how I feel is how I feel. Period. End of discussion. No one else needs to agree with or support what I'm saying, how I feel is how I feel.

I spent a long time contemplating this decision. It wasn't a rushed decision or a rash one. I had a couple of epiphanies through the process:

1. All work can make the world a better place. Working for a non-profit doesn't make the work more noble or more fulfilling. It's what you bring to the job and what the job adds to you that raises the work to something more. It was really kind of arrogant or condescending or something to think about it otherwise-proof positive I have more to learn.
2. No work should negatively affect your self-worth. If and when that happens, run. Run as fast as your little feet will carry you. There is always another place to work. Seriously, run. All that negative emotion builds up and builds up. Eventually it's going to come out. Either at work or at home. There is only so much a person can hold in. 

Now that the decision is made and the transition has begun, I am happy, relieved, excited again. At one point in this process my youngest said "It will be nice to have a happy momma again." Sobering. I had no idea how much negativity and frustration I was bringing home. When I was sharing that with a friend, she said it begins to feel like a coat you put on, that weighs you down and affects every aspect of your life.

No job is worth your personal happiness. None. 

Unfortunately for me, not only was the job affecting me at home, it affected me at work, too. I was so frustrated and well, pissed, that I had an argument at work which I'm not pleased about. I stayed there too long. I take responsibility for that. I did not call out the bully and I put up with the policies I didn't agree with. I take responsibility for that, too. Owning up to my part in the 'argument' at work is and was a real sore spot with me. Not that I take full responsibility for the argument, because it takes two people to fight. What I find upsetting about that incident is that I let my frustration push me into behavior that I can't abide. I don't like arguing. I am quite good at expressing myself and I tell the truth and I work hard to listen really well. I don't like arguing and I don't think it belongs in the workplace. Refer to #2 above. I don't like who I felt I was becoming in relationship to my supervisor. 

No job is worth losing who you really are. None.

There are other gruesome details, which I'm not going to document. I really don't ever want to revisit it and I can't see how it would benefit anyone else. I want to move on, into the light. Suffice it to say, I learned a lot about myself, I will treasure most of the people I met there and I'm grateful, eternally grateful, for the experience. It sounds crazy, but I am eternally grateful for the entire experience, the good, the bad and the ugly. 

Since I know to get where I'm going, I had to be where I was, there's no regret. While I might be disappointed with aspects, I learned there is still more to learn. And really, thank goodness for that. I mean, why would I even get out of bed every day if I were perfect? 

Thought to Ponder

The way you treat your employees is the way they will treat your customers. ~ Richard Branson, Virgin



more to come, soon.

Tips for Craiglist Buyers

I have a thing you have bothered to call about, so it must be something you want. I'm simply selling something I no longer need or want. You are not doing me a favor. If anything, I'm doing you a favor, so if you want me to sell it to you, start with following this checklist:

1. Show up on time. Arrive when you say you are going to arrive. Being late is disrespectful. Disrespect does not incline me to want to sell you anything.
2. Remember: I am a person. 
3. We've never met before, so being pleasant and courteous is a good start.
4. I am selling an item. You are not doing me a favor. 
5. I've put a price on it. That's the price I want or I would have put a different price on it. 
6. YOU are NOT doing me a favor.
7. Don't call 10 times talking about random things or call, trying to keep me on the phone going over and over and over the same thing. I don't have that kind of time. 
8. Don't call 10 minutes before you said you'd arrive to ask for a different time. Again, disrespectful. 
9. Don't start listing all the things that are wrong with the item when you arrive. It's rude. Rudeness does not incline me to want to sell you ANYTHING.
10. You don't want it? Fantastic. Just say so and have a safe trip home. 
11. YOU ARE NOT DOING ME A FAVOR.

Criminy! What on earth are you thinking? Coming to my house and acting like a fool? Calling on the phone eating up my time and energy for nothing. Seriously putting a disclaimer on the ad right now. Fools and Disrespecters need not respond. Some day soon this is going to be a very funny story.

It's a quickie update of sorts...

We've been away for vacation. It was the best vacation yet - relaxing, fun, interesting, filled with people I love. Just the sort of bliss that you want to continue always, which got me to thinking about what might be in my life that negatively impacts my bliss. While floating on the lake or visiting charming small towns around the lake, I let my mind work in the background. No forced study, no struggle, no angst, just letting my brain do what it does best. At the end of the week, I knew that several things needed to change. (I started this on August 2 and am just finishing it today. When you start reading, perhaps you will understand why.)

Scarlet & Gray

The first on the list was my phone. It's nearly 4 years old and in smart phone technology, that's generations! For example: new smart phones have 2GB of RAM standard these days; my old phone had 368 MB of RAM (2GB=2000MB). So? you might say as my husband did... So, it means that when more than one app is running, using RAM, there are MANY screen freezes, system shut downs, inability to use the keyboard, etc. It had also started to lose functionality... like backing up.

So, what to do, what to do. I really love all the new technology, big screens, fancy cameras, but I do not really love the price tags. Technology, like cars, comes at a crazy premium for this year's model. I decided to take the same approach I do when buying a new car... I bought a good quality used model with all the important aspects I was looking for, but at a price I can live with. The bonus to the route I went is I don't have to commit to a two year contract. This is one are of my life where I am a true commitment-phobe. 

So now, I'm a happy iPhone user, who lost all my contacts. Apparently iPhone and Android are not friends and won't share contacts, which I didn't know. And I could enter them all in manually, except the old phone will not cooperate with that. So, I've been slowly rebuilding my contact list. Some people just don't want to help a girl out and so I'll be doing without the pleasure of their contact info. Oh well.

Another thing on the list is my job. I haven't been super happy... Okay, I haven't been happy, even, nevermind super happy, for a while. I like working and I want to feel happy working. I have in the past, so I know it's possible and I don't think it's asking too much. I'm discerning just how to handle this and as it's a big one, I'm taking my time. As Forrest Gump would say: That's all I have to say about that. For now. But, I'll keep you posted.

I've been suffering with some sort of rosacea on my face for a while now. At least I think it falls under the category of rosacea. As with a lot of things, there isn't one cause, everyone experiences it differently with different triggers and combinations of symptoms. The point is: I'm over it. It's negatively affecting me in subtle, sinister ways (like avoiding having my picture taken or avoiding situations with new people). I'm over it. I don't want to live like a hermit.

And it's not like I've been doing nothing... I tried eliminating common "food triggers", but to no avail. Eliminating wheat, tomatoes, spicy food, caffeine, sugar, etc... Any common food trigger I eliminated individually and in combination only made meal time challenging and made no difference whatsoever to my face.  

So, back to the drawing board. I've been researching and have found a couple of things that are really making a difference.

You may remember my post earlier this year about changing what products I was using for skin and hair care, to eliminate sketchy chemicals. At that time, I switched to using only Castille soaps for body and face. That made a difference. The one I use has two ingredients in it: Olive oil, Aloe. Because of the olive oil in the soap, I no longer need lotion on a daily basis. I use it occasionally when it's dry, but haven't used any all summer (so much humidity). Then, after much research and waiting for supplies to arrive, 10 days ago, I started using a blend of avocado oil and tea tree oil before bed. I basically use a 2 to 1 ratio, more avocado, which I eyeball so it's not exact. The change in my face has been dramatic. DRAMATIC. It's only been 10 days and it's noticeable! I was talking to my husband yesterday and he paused mid-sentence and told me how much better it looked. WOO!

Another area that needs attention is organization in our house. We live in a very old house, built when closets were novelties, so there is a serious lack of storage. So whatever storage we have must be really organized and faithfully reviewed. Prior to two years ago, I was much more diligent about looking at the drawers and cabinets and organizing and cleaning them out. But in the last two years it's fallen by the wayside a little and it's starting to negatively affect every day life. I've purchased a few shelving and storage ideas and am going to attack (sounds fierce, doesn't it!) the corner cabinet in the kitchen. I don't know why I think this must be the source of all the clutter, but I do. So, I'm about to wrap up this post and begin. 

There is much in life to be grateful for and every day I see it more and more. This post seems like of litany of problems, but I hope you will look at it the way I do. Life has challenges in it. Period. It does. No one is exempt. In knowing that, I find it very easy to say okay, this is what today holds let's get after it. In putting things aside, not really looking at it, refusing to deal with it or in any other way denying your challenges, just let's them breath and grow. When you shine a light on it, fear (and trouble) withers. It cannot withstand scrutiny. Fear needs the dark and the secret. 

This blog is my way of shining a light on things that are challenging me. I don't always list the most troublesome primarily because not every challenge I face is strictly my own. Just because I feel good and right about posting my personal struggles does not mean I have the right to detail the challenges of those I love. Respect first.

Geez, this is a long post. If you made it all the way to here, Woo HOO! I hope you found something worthwhile. If you didn't, you won't be reading this so, no point in finishi...

So, ALL that being said... I feel energized and am going to get after it. 

PS... We are still yoga-ing, now two times a week. LOVE it!

Birthday Party

Today my youngest is 21. It's a good day and just a little wistful. 21. Such a momentous occasion. Always on their birthdays, I find myself flipping through the photo albums in my memory of all the years.

He arrived 5 weeks early and has been on the move ever since. He's amazing and wonderful and challenging and smart and it's a pleasure and an achievement to be his mother.

Happy birthday sweetness!

Thoughts on Starting a Business

Chickens in the yard.
Charming.

It's been just over six months since I started selling my creations. It has been very, very, very good. Here are some thoughts on the adventure:

1. I am proud of all I have learned, which has been a lot. 
2. I am even more proud of the work I'm creating. I learn how to be a better artisan every time I sit down at the bench. 
3. I've started calling the table where I work on my jewelry "The Bench". It makes me smile.
4. Worrying only removes the fun.
5. Some things are challenging. Accepting challenges are part of the process does make it more manageable when they show up.
6. I did not know A LOT before I started. I knew I'd have things to learn, but boy oh boy! I still have learning to do, but now I realize that will always be the case.
7. The more creative I am, the more creative I feel. I wake up thinking about things to make!
8. It is easy to get distracted. I've made a list of goals and posted them at my bench, so I can keep them in focus. 
9. It's a time commitment. Like the challenges, accept that you will spend a surprising amount of time building your business. If you are the sort to schedule things, by all means, make a schedule. Sticking to a schedule is not my strong suit, so I wing it. 
10. I Celebrate Everything! Seriously! It's just me in this business and up til now, lots of it has been challenging or frustrating. To make sure I remember why I started, I make a point of celebrating every little success: finishing something, learning a new skill, figuring out how to take more interesting photos. Celebrate it all. 
11. I ask a lot of questions. I don't magically know the answer to everything that crops up. Asking others allows me to gather information I use to make decisions. Sometimes the people I ask don't know anything either, but quite often, solutions occur to me in the midst of my information gathering. So I ask questions... of anyone it occurs to me to ask and everyone I consider my peeps.
12. Taking breaks is important. For me this business is meant to be fun. For me it's about being creative and letting my spirit dance. When the work of it starts to overshadow the fun, it's time to put away the pliers. Seriously.
13. Buy good tools. Whatever you are doing, you need the correct tools to get you there. About a month ago, I upgraded my tool set. It was an investment, even though I did not buy the most expensive set out there. It was worth every single penny. Good tools allow you to produce good work. More than that, good tools help you easily make good work. Let me explain: I had a bead crimper, purchased 10-ish years ago. It's frustrating. The criimp bead has to be in there just right to get it to work. I purchased a new one and out of the gate and every time I use it, it works correctly. It is more narrow or slimmer and fits into the tight spaces easier. It has a long narrow flat tip, more narrow, but just like flat nose pliers, which you sometimes need when while crimping. I realize I'm going on here, but really, truly, it's amazing. The day I decided to order a new one, I'd spent 10 minutes trying to close the crimp bead on a bracelet and rather than crimp, it broke the bead and the bracelet fell apart, beads scattering everywhere. I could go on and on about every single tool I replaced. The new set is wonderful, and helps me create what I have in my mind. Amazing.
14. Similar to #11. I spend time learning techniques from others. Books, classes, YouTube, and just surfing other sellers. I find new things to try, new ways to do things, improvements for things I'm already doing. 
15. I spend the time to review every order the moment it arrives. I look at everything, making sure I received every item ordered and that it's all in good condition. I won't sell a damaged piece as though it's in perfect condition. Not everyone has the same rules or standards that I do. I've learned this the hard way. 
16. I am grateful. This has been a fun ride. I've learned a lot and grown through it. It's brought a new aspect to my relationships with my kids as they've become advisors for my business. It's a fun and rewarding experience. I love being creative. I love making other people happy! I'm stronger, happier and more me because of this adventure and I'm so grateful!

Of Human Tornados and Growth

Yesterday was an interesting day. Work was filled with drama and angst and tension, all of which arrived with and stemmed from one single person.

Thankfully, it wasn't me.

It's disconcerting to watch a human tornado in action. Leaving chaos and confusion in it's wake.

For most of the day, I held myself separate. It's a skill I've been practicing for some time. You know the phrase "in this world but not of the world"?  I've been developing the skill of witnessing, without committing emotional energy.

So yesterday, I was in the chaos, but I was not of the chaos. Until the last 30 minutes of the day, when I let myself swirl around in it. And then it affected my evening, as negativity is wont to do.

Because it did, I realize how much work I have to do. At the same moment, I realize how much work I have done. I mean, I was separate for most of the day. Focused on my own goals and accomplishments, I was aware of, but not involved in the tornado. Each time it approached me, I smiled and moved myself out of the path. This is good to recognize. I feel lighter, happier and accomplished realizing it. Yea!

Turns out I don't begrudge having work to do. This is also growth! There have been times when I'd beat myself up for not being more, better, perfect. Those times are past. I no longer expect or want perfection. Hooray! Hooray! Hooray!

My goal is to be love. In every situation, every relationship and every interaction, my goal is to express love. Which is not to say that I give up my needs or wants to keep the peace. It is not loving myself to constantly give in or not express my feelings or to take verbal abuse from anyone. What I mean here is that there are ways to say what needs to be said without leaving destruction in your wake and that is my goal. Some days I am really good at it. Some days I recognize situations that trigger negative responses and know I have work to do.

I found this quote from Deepak Chopra. It made me think of the number of times I've said "I didn't have a choice". Kind of a cop out isn't it? I didn't have a choice means, I made a choice I don't think you will like or I made a choice that does not live up to my expectations for myself. So, I'm repeating it to myself each morning. Because I always have a choice, I choose Love.

Love is the answer. 
I choose Love.
Love is all you really need. 
Love. 
Love.
Love. 

Lots to See and Want

I've been busy loading my etsy shop with some fun new items... come visit!

It's my Birthday!

Oh yes it is! It's my birthday and I'm celebrating. Join me, won't you? Aren't these beautiful?!  They arrived yesterday and got the party started! 

This morning when I woke up, this was waiting for me:

Life is pretty grand. Let's all have an especially great day!

Okay, I get it.

So, you know when a life lesson is staring you in the face and you really don't want to see it? So life gets a little bit louder and little bit fiercer? And then you try to talk your way out of the lesson? You try to reason with the lesson? You try to negotiate with the lesson? You try and rationalize the lesson? Ignore it? Get pissed? ARGUE with it?

Well, I do. I've been doing all of that. For longer than I'm willing to document. I've been doing it and I finally am calling Uncle. OK, I get it. Okay, OKay, OKAy, O  K  A  Y! I'm paying attention. I'm no longer sticking my head in the sand. I am looking right at you life lesson and I am accepting.

For anyone who might be reading this little post, please send a kind thought, a prayer, a hope winging for me. I need it. While I am looking at the lesson, know what it means, accept I've got to learn it, I still have some trepidation. I welcome all positive thoughts. I accept all the help available to me.

These sweet little Johnny Jump Ups are symbols of the abundant nature of life. I haven't planted these in years. Like 8 years, maybe more, and yet they appear year after year after year. Volunteers. I love them. Pansies are beautiful flowers and that is reason enough to love them. I also love them for their resilience and tenacity. These sweet blooms are a reminder to just be me and universe will also provide what I need to flourish. 

3 weeks and it is good...

It's official. I like yoga. I know, big surprise. Week 3 was great. I could do things on Sunday that I could not do the first day. That is big. I felt less awkward and more confident. Of course, I'm still quite thankful that I cannot see myself in a mirror! But I still felt more confident in doing the moves.

Near the end, we did something called "Happy Baby". I'd never heard of it before and as the instructor introduced it and explained how to accomplish it, a giggle burst out of me, only to be joined by my husband's giggle. Such a fun moment. Want to know what Happy Baby is?  Yep, just like the picture, on your back, feet in the air, hands holding them. So funny!

It's official. I'm hooked. I downloaded an app to my tablet. Namaste!

The past week and menopause

Okay, Yoga week two. More challenging. Not awful, not super hard, just more challenging. We learned new poses, we spent more time in them, in significantly warmer temperatures and my period started.

Sorry if this bothers anyone, but as this blog is for me and this is something I may need to refer back to, I'm about to document menopause and menstrual cycles. I started perimenopausal symptoms several years ago. You know, hot flashes, disrupted sleep, strange menstrual cycles amongst other really fun symptoms. A friend and I were discussing it, because of course I thought I was too young. No, she says, you aren't. I did more research only to learn perimenopause can last 2-10 years. Oh Joy!

Although my periods have been varied, sometimes long, sometimes short, sometimes, really close together, sometimes very heavy, I never skipped a month, until this year. I had a period in January and February and then nothing. So, I thought Woo! Done with that. Until Saturday. And once it started I've felt drained, exhausted, even. And it's not like it's even worth the effort, so light a period it is.

By the way, when you try to discuss your situation with a doctor, the mood swings, the sweating, oh my lord, the mood swings, the weight gain, the random hairs growing everywhere, the sweating, and any and everything else... Know what you will hear? "It's in the realm of normal". serious eye rolling here! I actually don't think it matters what you tell them. "I'm seeing purple polka dots", "I have hair growing between my toes", "I have a sudden craving for olive ice cream"... you'll get the same response. I haven't tried it, lol, but that would make the appointment way more fun! 

This topic is not discussed enough. I've polled all my friends. No one talks about it. Probably because it's embarrassing. Probably because by the time it happens to your mother you're grown, away at college or living on your own and so you don't see it. IDK. For my mother, her body was forced into early menopause by chemo. It wasn't the same. She had all the signs and symptoms condensed down into a 3 month period. She went from normal to menopausal in the blink of an eye, and really couldn't separate the chemo side effects from the menopausal symptoms, so I really have no reference points, which is why I've quizzed all my friends.

Onto a new topic. I'm so over perimenopausal/menopausal! If you have any insight - - I'd appreciate you sharing. 

I knitted some adorable baby hats this week for our newest grandson. He's a sweet little bundle! I've never knitted a baby hat before. It was a challenge. I followed three different patterns and only 1 turned out a reasonable facsimile of the correct size. And yes, before you ask, I did a swatch test and knew I, as I always do, was knitting larger. Even dropping down a needle size or two, didn't help the end product. ARGH! So, I went with the one pattern that nearly worked, added three extra stitches and ended up with some very adorable hats! Picture to come!

My office at work is at the farthest point from the air conditioner and so I've been told by people who are supposed to know, that it's just 'the way it is' that it's sweltering in there. BOO! Have I mentioned I'm perimenopausal (or possibly menopausal, who knows) and I'm warm all the dang time? Well yesterday was the hottest day of the year, so far, and very sunny. It was a sweat box and I felt myself getting more and more pissed as the day progressed. So yet another call and am now awaiting Frick and Frack (my names for the maintenance team) to come and take another look.

So, the blog views have passed the 5000 mark. What do you think about that? Yea, I don't know what to think, either. It's cool, though. I hope you are enjoying it. I also hope you take the ranting with a grain of salt. Negative-ness is better out than in and this blog is my getting it out place.

We've begun painting the living room. I know. It's a lot of painting. Eh, what can you do? I do like to switch stuff up and my husband is a trooper. I really like saturated color, but have decided to go lighter and brighter in there. The color is called cream in my coffee or something like that and hubby picked it out. It's tough to tell just yet, but I'm leaning toward liking it. :-)

My niece was over this afternoon and ended up playing cards with my son. I was in an adjacent room, working on my jewelry, listening to the two of them. They were completely adorable. Insulting and laughing and sharing secrets. I just love kids. She and her family moved two country doors down two years ago and it's been such a good thing. For all of us. 

And that is the news of the week, I think. Thanks for hanging in there.  I'm planning to take some pictures tomorrow to make the posts prettier. We have some stunning flowers in bloom around the house.

BTW-if that Yoga cat picture from a couple of posts ago, doesn't make you smile... Well I don't know what. Look again. It's funny!

Happy Thursday!

Yoga! Yoga! Yoga!

Well, I wasn't sore the next day or the next. I was aware of some muscles that I hadn't been aware of before yoga, but not sore. AND... my bum knee, that I hurt in the 6th grade when we were sitting on our desks tossing around a nerf ball that went just a little wide and when I went to step down on the floor to reach it, my foot was caught in my bell-bottom corduroys and I fell onto the concrete floor, right on my knee, which swelled up like nobody's business and I had to use crutches for a week to let it heal and the swelling to go down.  (are you impressed by the run-on-ness of that sentence?) Well you should be!

Anyway, I fell on my right knee in the 6th grade and as I age, my knee grumbles. But, the yoga totally eliminated any sort of pain in my knee for two days. Seriously! And you'd think that all the child's pose and cow and cat poses, it would stress out my knee, but no. I did each thing as long as I could do it, and my knee thanked me for it for the next two days. So I'm really looking forward to going back. I'm trying to figure out how I can get to classes more often, once I finish the beginner course. I like feeling good, so I want to find time for it.